It hurts when I smile

Hello!


How are we this Monday?

Torturing device

It was a painful experience today regarding my catheter. First of all everybody and their mother is on vacation right now so it wasn't any normal nurse that I knew from the CLSC that came by to change the thing, it was a completely different nurse. She put me in bed, stripped me naked and commenced the operation. Everything is normal until she started to insert the catheter. Huumm, that's odd, I never felt that before. Wait a minute!? That's freaking pain! It freaking hurts! The nurse asked me to let her know if it was hurting, you bet your sweet ass is hurting!! So she pulled back the catheter and basically started to wonder what she had done wrong, I asked her if she had put some KY jelly to lubricate the...er... How should I put this? To lubricate the apparatus, the long and thick apparatus, the apparatus so big that it has made hookers cried in the past... Okay let me dream a bit! I would have thought that being in the year 2011 we would have better medical equipment, like a pill something to eliminate the urine from the body.

For those who don't know what the apparatus is, I am referring to my penis which needs to be lubricated so they can insert the catheter through it. Sorry for the big words, but big things require big words! I'm talking about the pain here. For some reason she had done everything as the other ones before her had done but for some reason it wasn't working. So she started fresh, took a new catheter out and proceeded to disinfect the area, put more jelly and inserted a new catheter once again. Success! This time it didn't hurt and everything went smooth. So what the fuck? What was wrong with the other catheter? As far as I can tell there was nothing wrong with it, I think the problem lay with her not putting enough jelly before... Only one more month to go before I' I don't have to wear the stupid catheter through my stupid penis... No more changing catheters!


Sorry about the gruesome details, I just wanted you to know what I have to suffer every month with the changing of the guards... Sorry catheters.


Take care folks!