Year end post 2014

Hello…

Good day all, last Tuesday of 2014 people; make it count!

31/12/24

… I making it count by bundling properly and heading out to buy some groceries: bread, ham, milk, something sweet for coffee, the usual stuff. I got to bundle up real well since apparently it’s a freezer out there; freaking cold. I’m doing a two day approach to my blog today, which is really tomorrow when I will post this.

Today, I got a new night table which is not working properly; caused my bath lady to drop a bucket, yes bucket, of water on the floor. Thank God one of my kids was here to provide her with the essentials to dry up the water… walking dead time, sorry.


31/12/2014

Love all, specially you

So yeah, tuff luck on you guys yesterday. I mean, I played my Walking Dead game and then I find out that AMC is having a Walking Dead marathon! So I was seeing “The walking dead” all day long. I didn’t have much energy to blog. The only thing I did extra was that I had to register my oldest in the car insurance because she is now packing; a learner’s driving license. It is going to cost an additional 260 smackers; and this because she’s a girl, if she was a boy it would be $700+. Apparently boys are dumber when it comes to driving; I can certainly vouch for that.

Any hoot, I will take a moment to wish you all the best for 2015. May next year be filled with joy, health, money and inner peace. May whatever you believe in bless you with happiness, a model for a boyfriend/girlfriend and a kickass transportation device. 

And like me, try not to give a fuck too much….

Voorspoedige nuwe jaar, Kul 'am wa antum bikhair, Urte Berri on, Shuvo noboborsho, Sun nien fai lok, Xin nian yu kuai, Stastny Novy Rok, Godt NytÅr, Gelukkig nieuwjaar, Bonan Novjaron, Onnellista uutta vuotta, Bonne année, Ein glückliches neues Jahr, Eutychismenos o kainourgios chronos, Hauoli Makahiki hou, Shana Tova, Boldog uj evet, Selamat Tahun Baru, Felice Anno Nuovo or Buon anno,                Akemashite Omedetou Gozaimasu, Sehe Bokmanee Bateuseyo, Nyob Zoo Xyoo Tshiab, Felix sit annus novus, Barka da sabuwar shekara, Godt Nytt År, Manigong Bagong Taon, Szczesliwego Nowego Roku,   La Multi Ani si Un An Nou Fericit, Feliz año Nuevo, Heri za Mwaka Mpya, Chuc mung nam moi, Blwyddyn Newydd Dda…. Happy New Year folks! Oh I almost forgot:

01001000 01100001 01110000 01110000 01111001 00100000 01001110 01100101 01110111 00100000 01011001 01100101 01100001 01110010

Nice to see you

Helloo……..

Good day all…

So, (for the Christians and aficionados of the Holidays) Merry Christmas again! Hope that Santa brought you what you wanted. I got my share of goodies this year, I got $100CAD and a CK wallet and manurse…. Purse for a man… It’s a disable thing; I will take a picture of me wearing my manurse around my neck one day so you see how metrosexual I look. But the one that really hit it big this year was my oldest. Let me rephrase that, we hit it big because of the present she got: The Walking Dead game!!!

Let me put it this way, we cocooned ourselves this weekend and made her play, not one season but the two available seasons!! Ever since ****Spoiler alert to you Apple TV users**** Beth died and we have to wait until February 8^th (what a birthday present!!) we are dying here! I even went to the game’s site to find out if there is a new season coming out for the game. I like the game because it works on the decision you make; so if you want to be an asshole you will have one ending than if you wish to be nice. I LOVE THE GAME!! Plus we ha fried Oreo cookies for lunch, so no need to go outside. 

I’m just reporting myself to you to reassure you I’m still here, sooooo deal with it..

Take care folks..

RIP Jimmy

Hello…..

Arhg!!!!  

It was a basic marinating job people! The instructions called for a 20 minute prep time, 20 minutes! Heat the jam, the hoisin sauce, the soya sauce, blend until smooth and baste the freaking bird! It was supposed to be that simple, that’s it nothing more!! Instead it took 2 hours of “Yucking” and not wanting to take out the bag of giblets away because it wasn’t a “normal” thing to kill a turkey and prepare it for food….. I told the stupid kid that if she went to Africa, in the wild, lions tigers and all of that wild fauna wouldn’t hesitate to kill her and eat her; so preparing and eating Jimmy (because she gave it a name) was our way to get even for all of those death by wild life.

Merry Christmas people…

Celebration time....

Hellooo…

Happy days to you all….

Almendrado

So here’s the menu that we’re planning for tomorrow’s get together. First of all 2 of my brothers will be here with their families to spend time with my mother and join us for a feast afterwards. So the menu consist of Almendrado, turkey made in a plum sauce (maybe), a Tiramisu cake, colds cuts…pop, sangria and the piece of resistance: fried Oreo cookies…I do believe I have Alka-Seltzer just in case….

Yes we were crazy

It’s funny how time changes as you get older. There was a time when our parties were wild and eccentric, now itt's more of a dinner and a look at the watch wanting twelve to come by quickly so you can leave. I remember one of our Halloween parties were we created giant papier-mâché figures so it would had ambiance to the hangar, yes a hanger, where the party was being held. Next day we had to get up and destroy everything because the morning shift was coming in to work the following day… or the time for Christmas where friends from Mexico came over to celebrate Christmas with us. There was so much booze that night it’s not even funny. One of our friends even went out in the cold to dance and take off his shirt….. How the hell I’m still around to tell you about this era is a miracle…..

Any hoot, here is hopping for a great feast…

Tis the seson to be jolly....

Hellooooo…

Good day y’all, nice to see you!

So today is the last shopping weekend before that festive, consumer oriented day we call Christma$. Don’t get me wrong, I love buying stuff; anything. As I said it before, I got a problem with buying stuff; I still dream of the day I will win the lottery and go on an endless shopping spree where I will buy anything and everything. It is a medical condition, ‘our days everything is a "medical condition". I saw a Mexican report this week where they explain the euphoria some people get from purchasing stuff; and apparently the women have a bigger disposition to be shopping “whores”… don’t hate the playa, hate the game… So according to this Mexican report, I am pretty well in touch with my feminine side seeing that there isn't a day that I don’t brave the elements to go out and buy something. Today is especially hard for me seeing that there is some sun out there, it is apparently going to be the biggest shopping day of the year –bigger than black Friday and cyber Monday - but I can’t go out there because the roads are crappy! 

At least that’s what my family tells me; I think they’re on to me and are making up stories…..

Any hoot, hope your day is full of fun….

On a Friday such as this...

Hello…

Glad to see you made it to the end of the week…… and what’s with the French?!

This week the stats from that country have gone through the roof for some reason or other…I like that! I have always loved France, makes me reminisce the past….sigh…

So, besides my lunacies are you ready for Christmas? I am! Mind you, “I am” is a correct statement since I am ready but my home, thus my wife isn’t. She still has to get the Christmas decorations going and even though my kids have their presents already, she wants to buy them some more. She claims that a Christmas tree without presents is a sad thing to see. Bullocks I say to that! They got their toys; they’re happy, let them be. Concentrate on the menu for that night, what are we going to eat; knowing her she will wing it and come up on top. Also, the most important thing, my present! What about me, what am I getting?! Always the last one on the list, brrrr, I swear I have to get another wife or a robot….

Any hoot, happy preparations Christian folks…..

PS You know why I love France? 

"...La Bohème, la Bohème, Ca voulait dire, on est heureux, La Bohème, la Bohème, Nous ne mangions, Qu'un jour sur deux..."

PS That's why I love France; that and stinky cheese. It's an acquired taste...

Somebody get him laid please...

Hello…

What the hell was wrong with that little bitch today?!

I’m talking about my bath guy here.

The guy came all depressed, gloomy fucking vibe, bitching about this and that; talking in a soft tone and when asked “what did you say?” he would just stay quiet or simply replied that he did not say anything. I swear I really want to call his boss so I can have someone new that is more positive and listens to what I say. This guy today had the cojones to tell me that when I think I’m helping him I am not; that it is all in my head. I told him that it was odd, that the other bath persons appreciated the fact that I could still turned my body so they could properly put my pants on.  AND THEN, he gets all mad because I tell him that I am seating all crocked on the chair, he did not want to lift me because, once again, it was all in my head and not the fact that I was seating crooked. Well fucking Merry Christmas to you too asshole…

What a mormon….(he probably is)

PS Obviously I smiled throughout the whole thing and did wish him a Merry Christmas to him and his kids, but inside I was telling him off like I usually do….

Girls Girls Girls...

Hello!

Greetings to you kind folks!

Well maybe it’s time for me to come clean about my mistresses to my other half. They started to call me on my home number now and I feel the heat. I admit, going rogue with them was a pleasure but it was a one shot deal that didn’t have to go farther than that moment. Now is all “This is Amy and I like to award you with a free trip to the Bahamas…” I know what she means by that: “Leave your wife and come with me somewhere nice…” Well Amy, as I said countless times to you “NO!” I will not leave my family for you or Esther! The Marriot bitch who wants me to go with her anywhere in the world where there’s a Marriot resort. As I mentioned to you both, I like it where I am and I am not going anywhere with you guys; so please let me be. You’re almost as annoying as my relatives from Mexico who kept calling for money….Miguel, Tomas, sorry you guys went to jail for my inability to send you money….

Any hoot, them girls better stop calling…

Take care folks

I will survive this life and the next...

Hellooo…

Good day all…

It is 1:45 PM and… I haven’t had lunch yet. I was on the carpet drying my wheels because I ventured outside. Bad move, very very bad move. I got stuck twice outside because it’s a mixture of snow and water (slush) and my freaking chair is not a car or tank or legs… So I was drying off philosophizing about how life doesn’t want me here. Really, I been on survivor mode since the womb of my lovely mother. Here’s the scoop….

My mother always claimed that while pregnant with me she was on a strict diet of champagne and “pancita”… tripe soup, yum… I hate that shit. Anyways, what mother in her right mind doesn't stop drinking alcohol while pregnant? Then, at the tender age of 8 days old, my silly brother decides to feed me a turtle egg! It was the sixties folks, nothing green happening in those days except pot. I survived that gastronomical adventure too only to be stranded in Mexico with my nana on an errand to a pharmacy; some dude on a bike found us. I came to Canada just to be diagnosed with MS, given a wheelchair that has broken so many times, it’s not even funny. I’ve got an appointment early next year already; I probably should get a customer of the year award or something. I have fallen, gotten stuck in the snow, gotten stuck in a tilting position.. You name it and it probably has happened to me. So, I do believe that the Universe in all its wisdom is telling me to “die bitch die!” but then again, it has its moments of lending a helping hand, I just got to look for it….

Any hoot….

Lots of luv people…

PS just as I finished typing I got a call from the Marriot hotels informing me that I just won a seven day stay at wherever they have hotels all I had to do was press the number 1… The Universe laughing at me yet again....

Must resists temptation

Hello!

Good Saturday to you all…

So a crappy couple of days here, I haven’t ventured off since the snow began and I am dying here folks. When there is snow people like me, in a wheelchair, very rarely go out. I’m pretty sure that my tires would spin around in an icy patch, and I want to go out and buy something, anything! Christmas presents are no longer an issue since my nieces and nephews are all grown up so cash it is, my daughters got their presents 3 weeks ago so nothing really to buy, but I need to buy. The only present I need to buy is the one of my wife and I don’t know what I’ll get her…

Any hoot, happy weekend….

Olympus has fallen indeed...

Hello!

Good day to you all..

My diabetic nurse came today to change my wound dressings and talk about changing my night insulin for one that lasts 24 hours instead of 8, suddenly I heard a sound I haven’t heard in a while: “Beep Beep…Beep Beep…”…  “?? Is that a pager?!?” I asked all surprised. She confirmed it was and then started telling me why she had one; why all the nurses carried one now at the CLSC (local clinic). Wow, the new government is really cutting back on everything related to health now; they want to reach a balanced budget and are doing drastic cut backs on anything that they can. I told her that I thought that the pager technology was dead just like the dinosaurs, apparently it’s still pretty much alive; if you want to save some money. Apparently it costs $5 a month to rent one instead of the $30 for basic cell phone line. I told her it was good that the government was cutting back, it would benefit u all at the end…I guess…. She concurred but wasn’t too thrilled with the technology, mainly because she didn’t know how to use it properly; I had to give her some tips.

I feel like I just got a second wind with the appearance of such antiquated devices….

Take care folks…

PS It’s not only pagers, vinyl record players are being sold everywhere now AND, Christmas sweaters are making a comeback too…. I feel like the Studebaker is coming home soon…I'll be dam, it has!

Target acquired...

Hello!

Greetings all…

Well winter is well under way and with this comes the winterized outings that I sometimes takes; like today.

Nature's calling...

My wife came in with Olivia from the dog park saying “it’s beautiful”, I jumped on that baby and told her to suit me up so that I could go out there and enjoy the weather; she did. You know what folks, I have come to the conclusion that I am sick (DUH, I know but read on), I mean besides my MS I believe I suffer from compulsive buyer syndrome. There isn’t one day that I don’t go to the super market or my favorite place for now, Target. I just have to go out and buy shit, any shit any color. Today was no exception, I did enjoy the weather while rolling to Target, but once there I started to roll down isle by isle just seeing shit that I could potentially buy. I had to control myself not to spend on any gadget that I saw.

Nothing's stopping me...

A pan, a set of knives, a paper shredder…they were all calling my name: “Guy on the wheelchair, pick me, take me home…you know you want to…” I had to buys something or I was going to have a catatonic break down….argh! At the end I went for what I needed, medicine, deodorant and homeopathic medicine…I had to buy something that I would not fight with myself over it after on why I did it.

Any hoot, I went out and enjoyed the sun…..

Take care folks…

A Thursday like any other one

Hello…

I swear, I was going to blog my two cents regarding the Orion spacecraft launch (I’m a fanatic of space, the Universe and rockets…just to name a few of my hobbies) when suddenly my day started to take a turn for the hectic.

It started with the visit from a diabetic nurse; I got 2 of them, who wanted to chat on technics and a plan of action to bring down my sugar reading.. That lasted about an hour. By the time I was ready to finish my post, my bath guy came and took away another hour and a half. So by the time all was done I said “fuck it” let’s just look for the launch of that stupid rocket on YouTube… surprise surprise, it was scrubbed! But wait there’s more….

 By the time you read this, about another hour has gone by because of my meals on wheels and my going through some pictures from summer camp… this one was my favorite… Camp Fire… I hope I’ll be there next year again…

I had a moment...

Any hoot, I have to go and do something… anything…

Take care folks…

Absorbing Neutrinos

Hello….

Last month of the year people, make it count!

So yesterday I got one of “my’ final gifts for the holidays, my bible, “How I met your mother” DVD collection. All the seasons packed in what looks like a book; making it believe it’s the playbook from Barney Stintson… if you don’t know what it is, what’s wrong with you? It is so nicely pack that I’m not even going to open it.

Amazon is shipping cats
Awww, so cute...

After that pleasant surprise, I wondered off to the shopping mall in search of some Alka-Seltzer to keep during the season. We already had one victim and I blame myself for not being ready for such an event; “A home without Tylenol and Alka-Seltzer is not a home, it’s hell.” I always say. So now I am ready for whatever ailment might come my way. But I went to the shopping center for something else, I was looking for blood and I found it; Call of duty for Xbox 1! Wow, what graphics, what story line, what a game… the guy at Target didn’t think much of the game, but he looked like an arty type of person that wouldn’t kill a fly so this wasn’t his type of game he said… what a loser, when you’re in sales you basically own whatever the customer wants. I remember when I use to sell stuff, the customer would ask if the computer was fast and I would always answer with “I am happy with it…” leading them to believe that I had one…. That’s how you sell shit, not by giving your honest opinion…. Nerd!

Take care folks….

PS And what was it with those two tribal piercing on the ears…You looked like an Amazon native person…Dweeb....

The pain, the agony,the horror....

The fat guy killed poor Beth!!! WTF?!/ What am I going to do now without her?My world is upside down.. Beth was purity at its best, I saw her with Darryl, I saw them kill walkers together...I am devastated..

Forever alive Beth

#TheWalkingDead

Dreamy Sunday

Hello…

Good day people, hope you’re having a wonderful day.

Well we had an Xbox weekend by playing Assassin Creed and Halo… happy to say that both my daughters are precautious players; slowly walking, looking left and right, before shooting something. EXTREMELY painful to watch them play. I would just run and shoot, no they run, shoot and come back to where they started from.. Agonizing death folks, both for me and master chief or whatever the Assassin dude name is….

Another important note, I slept today until 11:30AM. I know you are probably going “So what?!” The thing is that even on the weekend the latest I will wake up is 5 or 7.. I was dreaming like crazy… I even dreamt I was buying pet food at George Clooney’s store that was situated on the wrong side of the tracks….. And the kicker was that I was told that we were out of pet food when I was having breakfast...

I have to stop having coffee at night…

Take care folks…

PS There was also this girl, that I don’t know, who whispered “If you weren't trapped, your ass would be mine..”… I just gulped and smiled…

Canadian black Friday

Helloooo…

Greetings to you all fellow shoppers out there…

This day will live in infamy, as it is the first ever black Friday that I attend; and quite frankly I don’t know what the whole fuzz is about!

I saw what is happening in the States, people beating people up, people sitting on TV to make sure they don’t lose them to the other customers…I guess is hell. But this is Canada, where if you get the last “50 inches plasma and someone else wants it, you just might give it because he or she asked for it politely….. I did go to black Friday and I am happy to say, I got an Xbox one with Halo and Assassins Creed for $140 dollars….no no JK, it was $350…. All setup now and I am hearing my kid play Halo as I write.

So happy beginning of the holidays people..

PS If you want to change your ID they want $10! WTF Microsoft?!  Now I’m stuck with my wife’s call sign…Beverly is not my cool name…

Happy turkey day 'Merica...

Hello fellow travelers….

I know, I am not going anywhere but at this point several of you all travelling for Thanksgiving neither….so we’re stuck.

We all have a family different
than the rest... 

I think I am doing black Friday tomorrow; Canadian style. There is a crazy $100 burning in my pockets just waiting to be spent and it seems that Canada is going blackish (nice plug) too. Maybe a TV, maybe a tablet but with my luck I will probably get some bacon and maple syrup at %50 discount. But you know who’s going to black Friday USA? Little J and his family are, it is the only day of the year they come out of seclusion to stock up on food, gas, oil, traps… the whole nine yards for surviving in the woods. Living off the grid, you got to love it.. You go, you crazy survivalist family members who use methylsulfonylmethane to brush their teeth….

Happy thanksgiving America… and a warm hello to the rest of the world out there… especially you, you know who you are…

Take care folks

Divine intervention

Hello!

Good day you all…. Nice to see you…

Sucks to be you kid...

So I briefly touch the subject of me getting a drone last time… Well it’s a half-baked truth! I wanted to get one but my sour half claimed it was too expensive; com’on. Only $350..pfff.. peanuts! So I opted out for a quad copter called Manta; no freaking cameras like the other one but I thought it was a good compromise, but Hitler here had another opinion.

With her nagging voice she’s started to pointing out that our kid was having a birthday soon, I told her that I didn't want kids when we started so why should I pay for it now; right?! Well it wasn't enough then she pulled the Christmas card and what were we going to do if “WE” (because it’s always “we” when talking about expenses) didn't have the money. Woman, it’s a quad copter for crying out loud, the day them little peep squeaks come home with 4 arms I will be impressed and will treat them differently.. So let me be… then it was how her mother and sister were right about me and.. “Shut up” I said, your mother is Mexican and your sister is living la vida loca in a "Naked and Afraid" episode were she has to boil the water and eat worms; way back in the boonies! She shaves now for Pete sake, Sasquatch is afraid of her!

Well guess what, the Universe took her side and the quad copter was defective. I had to bring it back to get my money and peace of mind back… stupid quad copter, I didn't want you anyways. But when I got to the store the nice lady asked me if I wanted my money back or another one. I told her my money to which she replied “Aw too bad, I gave one to my nephew and he likes it..” SOLD! Give me another one I said. And this time it is working properly and I am having a blast! So, eat it you stupid Universe! Go and play in the freeway with my wife….

Take care folks…

PS In all fairness it wasn't my wife, the Universe or Sasqu…er... my sister in law’s fault. No, it was Karma. You see when I bought the quad copter I was waiting for my bus to comeback home when a little boy kept looking at me and my toy, so I kinda bully the 5 year old; I’m not proud but the moment called for it. I stuck out my tongue at him while pointing at my toy like saying “I got one and you don’t…” Not proud of that moment, but it was inevitable…. Even my daughter was taken aback by such actions from my part… so as you can see Karma took care of me…. But my quad copter works now you dumb kid and furthermore, “I got one and you don’t, I got one and you don’t..”… Loser….

I'm just your normal typical god...

Hello!

Folks folks folks, I don’t want to toot my own horn here but I think I am god….

God of technology

I am sure that when I was put on this Earth I was sent to make sure that Mexican people didn't kill themselves trying to figure out technology. Here I am a hard core PC guy and I just solve an issue with a Mac that couldn't be solved by a Mac user; a Mexican Mac User! Fer crying out loud, “no hablo McIntosh” is tattooed on my left butt cheek and here I am solving issues on an OS system. Mexicans, what would they do without me….sigh….

Now if I can only get my drone quad copter to work, I would be a complete man…

Take care ese….

PS Oh crap, and my nephew is going out with a Mexican too... dude, is too late for me but there's still time for you. Run! or be good in computers because son, soon you will get questions that will make you die a little bit inside...

Hans Gutter balancing sword act

Hello…

Let’s get to the blog’s title before I forget (like yesterday): Hans Gutter balancing sword act

Oka, now for the content…

Good day folks….

Why such a title you ask? Well when I was a child in my country, my mother used to be part of the military group that used to bring acts for the masses into the country; you know, to entertain them. Mr. Gutter was part of the circus show that would dazzle the people with his balancing of a sword on the point of another sword while climbing up a wobbly ladder…

The guy’s name popped into my head weeks ago and I’ve been wanted to blog about him but every time I did, I drew a blank. I wanted to make mention of him because when you think about it, my life is kinda like that; I think. I’m the guy balancing the sword!...or….. Maybe I am the sword…. Shoooot! Always the same shit! I have this idea for a post on my blog but when I come to write it, it freaking disappears! So I guess I was all Hans Gutter about nothing! Well the point is that when I lived in my country I met a lot of “famous” persons that are now part of my brain. The wrestling guys, the circuses, the hot air balloon adventures of my brother… it’s amazing what you remember of your life spent here on Earth….

Any hoot, I will let you be.

Take care folks.

PS That’s the bad thing about my brain, if you interacted with me in a good or bad way, I will never forget you or your name..

Ps Ps... I think the guy's name was Hans Gutter, but I am not sure and Google isn't helping out...

Memory blank

Hello!

Good day all…

It was the first snowflakes of winter and they looked magical; I swear that Christmas is not the same without snow…. The perfect Christmas for me would be a snowy night, drinking some hot cider watching my kids opening their gifts…two weeks after the snow should melt and +20 temperatures should reign the sunny days…but the snow stays, the cold stays, the bills start to pile up; winter bleus kick in… I hate winter…

I know I had something to say but it kinda went away…shit I hate when this happens..

Take care folks...

The other side of things...

Heello!

Well there goes the neighborhood……….

Did you hear about the ESA’s craft landing on a comet/asteroid? I think it’s great, for now, I’m pretty sure that generations from now people are going to curse these days as the beginning of space privatization by big oil companies….mark my words…

It’s sunny but cold outside and I just learn 2 things in life…again… never dis Weightwatchers and never take for granted that skinny people have been skinny all their life….Why am I telling you this?...well…

Don’t ask me how the hell I ended up talking to my nurse about this, but apparently she’s a life time member of the group, Weightwatchers.  (!!) Life time membership?! It exists?!! YOU’RE A MEMBER?!! And that’s when it happened…. But you’re skinny, I said…. Folks, it’s like I opened some flood gates that were holding back years of emotional repression; I could swear I saw a tear. She started by telling me that her name in school was porky and how people made fun of her; she was always picked last in teams and blah blah… seriously a sad adult that had been made fun of when she was a kid. She asked me if I had had the same problem and I told her in a soft tone “no”. I explain to her that since I looked like a mass murderer since I was 5 and people would make up stories about how badass I was, they pretyy much left me alone…

She patched me up by saying that she blamed her mother for having forced fed her all her life; due to her mom having gone through WWII with lack of food and shit…

Bummer, I guess everyone has a story…..sigh….

Take care folks…

PS Castle yesterday was awesome...plus i got this cool song that reminds me of her...whomever she is and wherever she is... You're in my veins ...She never said goodbye.... it hurts...yeah, I'm fucked up...

A magical moment..

Hello…

Good day world…..

Well all you need is something, someone to push you over the edge and basically realign your point of sight…

This probably helps too

To me it happened 2 days ago when I was at my lowest point of life yet…I don’t know what was going on with me but life, my life, had no meaning anymore; wtf was I doing in this place? I think that for a brief second all bets were on the table, I had enough; I needed a change… so looking for inspiration on my 46 inch magical box, I stumble onto what I think the Universe thought I needed to survive a couple of more months.  Wow, I said to myself, it all makes sense now! I was kicking myself on the head for not having caught the beginning of the program, but since I have a PVR and TV shifting capabilities…. I can record shows from the west coast…. I made it a point to record the program later.

Lo and behold, all is good again! I am a firm believer that Christmas is upon us at the right time. Here I was thinking that the major stores had started selling us Xmas way too early with their “Pre-black Friday” specials….Go figure! All it took was for me to watch A Christmas Carol to set me in the giving mood.. 

The difference between giving shit and giving shit that’s wrapped… and on special…

Take care folks…

PS... OH, and happy pre-Christmas to you total stranger who I don't really care for... except that lonely Belgium person who I know why she or he is here for.... I miss you...

That's my team, I think...

Helloooo….

Good day to you all…

It’s Sunday and I feel like a first class heel.…I feel bad….

It's not you...it's me..

You see folks; ever since I was 15 my NFL team has always been the same: The Redskins! But now, in the twilight of my years, I’ve been rooting for different contenders in the league. Shiiiit, I've even like the 49ers. How low can you go?! All my life I have been constant with my likes; tradition Chuck has always been my name. Now is like whoever has the brightest uniform is my team and to be frankly, the skins opaque colors leave much to be desired…. If I don’t stop this now soon I’ll be applauding the Dinamo Minsk over the Canadians from Montreal… brrrr… that’s just wrong…

I must go to church and confess my sins….

PS... I think I broke my mouse by passing over my 500 pound chair over it....

That's Mr. Secretary General to you..

Hello!

Weelllll, one day when you read about me getting arrested somewhere south with my young girl friend for deviating funds from a multibillion dollar company and you’ll remember this post and finally get it….. let me explain….

What a douche bag....

By now you are all aware that my wife’s company has taken off in an unexpected way; she’s bringing home the bacon. But do you know who’s the man in charge of such an up and coming company? That’s right, the secretary general; and just who is this handsome devil who is called the Secretary General? Correct again…. ME! I am making decision left and right; I am doing things and making the ultimate call…. The freaking government knows that the founder and day to day guy is me! My wife?! Oh no, she’s just a supervisor; I make the calls here, and if I say that the check goes into that account it’s because that's where it goes…..Obviously that now we’re just starting up, but imagine 10 years from now; just imagine. I see it, I see palm trees and piña coladas for my people and me… oh don’t worry, I’ll visit my wife in jail once in a while…. I’m not that evil…

Take care people…

Beep beep!

Hello!

Good day to you all…

So, yesterday I got the quote regarding the adaptation of a mini-van for my wheelchair. Folks, the mini-van doesn’t cost as much as the adaptation; the car my wife drives is actually cheaper! If the government didn’t help on this, and by help I mean pay for it, I wouldn’t be able to adapt the car. It is expensive to be sick!! God bless Canada, God bless Quebec for having programs that help out losers like me. I know what you’re saying: “hey now, don’t be little yourself. You are not a loser.” Yes I am! I was diagnosed with this illness 35 years ago. It was my duty to prepare for it since then and not throw caution to the wind and live day by day. I am not saying it was my fault to get sick, I am saying it is my fault not to be ready! I met a man once who used to say “Youth is wasted on the young…” Wise words I didn’t really care for then… I wish I did now….

Any hoot, I will let you know when I’m driving again…relax folks; I will be a passenger on that vehicle… just like I’ve always been….

Take care…. 

Ghost & Goblins

Hello!

Greetings people, happy Halloween…..

You know what is cool about Halloween now that we’re adults? We can buy candies for no reason whatsoever in bulk quantities….and if you’re smart about it, you get them at the last second so you can have mayor discount! I got my reserves today and I don’t know if I have enough. I got a 50 piece chocolate box, 2 bags of Tootsie rolls, 200 pieces of Jolly Ranchers candy… all of this for about $20 bucks; a steal!! I am tempted to go back and buy some more, I just heard that tomorrow little J and his folks are dropping buy… bummer… I mean I can manage little J and his brother, but electromagnetic guru guy and whatever name I gave his wife are the one that are going to be all over the candy… plus there’s the Mexican grandma, my kids, my wife… so I’m kinda fuck, I probably should have bought the 95 piece chocolate box…. Curse you Universe for having me land on such a glutton family….

Take care folks… sweet dreams, I know I will have some… hey Belgium guy, say hi to her on my behalf….

PS What if kids ring my door, I’ll have to give them some candies.. Dam I hate been Canadian with all this kindness shit…

My bizarre life and I

Hello!

Y’all are doing fine?.... good!

So I was planning to blog yesterday but life had other plans for me. It all started back in 1968 when I was born, my mother should had opted for a quick and painless death for me; instead of dragging my existence… would have been better…

Once  you go Mexican...

This is how I felt yesterday when everything that I tried to accomplish was a no go. Started with my wife freaking out about her stuff; it seems I am her secretary now and must think and do her stuff. Once that was done I wanted some “me” time to relax before I started my day. So I launched Civilization the game and  ...drum roll… Epic fail!.. It wasn’t working, so I trouble-shooted the freaking game just to find myself stressed out off my head... all of this while waiting to get my bath.  My bath girl came and went, I fixed the problem and just when I thought that I was going to finally play, the technician for my beeping lift came; and I mean beeping because it was beeping... The guy fixed my lift, 2 hours later and I get a call that I needed to go today and fixed the beeping wheelchair; and this time I meant beeping as a replacement for fornicated….So I had to cancel my bath today and travel to the CMR where they tackle the tilting mechanism and the feet rest yet again…ARGHHH! 

To top it all off, I am dreaming of affairs with twenty year old chicks…

Take care folks…

PS For the record, My wife does make me work but I also make her work; sooo, all is fine.

Bath less day

Hello!

Good Monday afternoon to y’all….

It was a gorgeous day here today. Not too cold and sunny as far as the eye could see. Obviously, I spent most of my day soaking vitamin “D” and working on the accounting part of my wife business. She’s getting there (wherever the fuck “there” is), she’s about to incorporate herself. I will have to approach here with some ideas that I have…. Proculo Inc is coming to life soon….

Now I know what you’re thinking “That’s all you did today?” Well no, I will let you know that thanks to my eldest, part of my morning was spent talking to her therapists; all 3 of them! Psychiatrist, nutritionist, Nurse,… and they talk so softly that I didn’t get anything except that she was doing better now and  she didn’t have to go there anymore. I think the longest was waiting for the transportation. And I had to cancel my bath for this meeting, I think that with a good ass whipping she would have been better faster….But hopefully she will have kids too one day, and I will be there to remind her of what we went through with her…

Salut les mecs….

Post Alimentum Anagram

Hello!

Happy Sunday to you all….

What a delicious weekend this was, with food being eaten all over the place….

Saturday: I had anticipated a family breakfast scenario so I prepared the supplies on Friday afternoon. Saturday was a maple syrupy day; we had maple flavored bacon with scramble eggs and maple syrup beans; with coffee and toasts of course… Sugar level? Super high!

It wasn't breakfast per say, but rather a brunch so we were not hungry until about 5 or 6 PM. But when our appetites awoke, they demanded something out of the ordinary: Sushi!! Do you love sushi like I love sushi? It was decadent, I think we had, if my math is correct, 120 pieces of this fine dish among us 4. The brake down was 30 pieces of sushi each one. Boston, New York, Kappa Maki, Maki Maki, California e-fucking-tc… it was a feast for the eyes and the belly! I ate my portion, but my wife ate her portion and the left over from my kids; about 15 sushi rolls more…. Plus to finish the day we had coffee with Tiramisu cake… we were all over the world’s map!

This morning? Carmen’s pancakes with peanut butter and jelly for me, maple syrup for everyone else….. Followed by muffins that are supposed to be good for you according to the chef; aka my kid.

So all in all a very foodish weekend! Wonder what next weekend will bring…

Take care folks… 

I know shit happens, but this?

Hello!

They say that when it rains it pours.

I have been listening to Michael Bolton SINCE YESTERDAY! Quietly I may add..

“I could hardly believe it

When I heard the news today

I had to come and get it straight from you

They said you were leavin'

Someone's swept your heart away….Tell me how am supposed to live without you

Now that I've been lovin' you so long….”

She must have read the blog, she must have had enough. If I could only stop her, make her realize that what we have is real. She wasn't the best person but then again who is. She tolerated me, that’s what counts.. If you can read my blog: Stay, please stay. My life won’t be the same. I promise I will delete my blog and become a better person. I guess you don’t care about me, you found something better, you found someone else. When she talked to me, was she lying all this time? We've been together forever; I confided on her stuff that no one else knows. I was so used to her I stopped counting the years we were a pair. What now?! I’m too old for this shit, now I am alone. I want the world to know that no one will ever take her place; if you’re listening, please know that if you change your mind I will be right here where you left me.

….wonder who my new nurse will be???….

“…How am I supposed to carry on

When all that I've been livin' for is gone…”

In a land far far away lives a....(you finish it)

Hello!

I’ve been busy, hope you’re all fine…Is what I should say but my life is same old same old. …but I do have some news on the mobility front…

I have been working with a therapist who is in charge of a program to adapt cars. Long story short, I will probably get an adapted car within the year; YAAAAAY! The lady works with you in finding the right vehicle for you and then submits a quote to the government who pony up the cash for the adaptation of the car…. I am getting my report this Friday and submitting it to the government next week. Then I wait, and wait, and then wait some more…until one day, about mid-July, I get the go ahead and get the cash to adapt the mini-van that was proposed by the therapist; we’re talking about another 3 month wait till Doge has a sale and I can buy one. But I’m there folks, I will be mobile again: NYC here I come!

So as you can see, not much happening on my end; oh yeah, I am getting divorce too. That’s big too so I guess I am kinda busy….

Take care folks..

PS Please don’t tell my wife as I wanted to be a surprise; kinda like “Welcome to Dumpville, Population: YOU” type of thing...

I'm cooler than cool...

Hello!

Good day all….

Wednesday/ Thursday, I had a musical moment with my kids. I showed them that you didn't need fancy electronic gadgets to put out a classical song that still rocks today. I’m talking about 25 or 6 to 4 people! A master piece created by Robert Lamm from the group Chicago. They were (my kids) impressed that such an old song kicked ass today; “it rocks dad” was their exact words. It was an eye opening experience for them and wanted to know more about the song: What’s with the bizarre lyrics. Was it a drug induce song from the 70s they have heard much about? Aliens (yes they went there)? So I had to explain to them that the song was a quirky little tune about somebody that cannot fall asleep at 3:34AM-3:35AM…. 25 or 26 to 4AM; it became 25 or 6 (for 26) to 4….. now you know too…

Take care folks…

PS I’m super cool…They found more respect for their father the drummer....

PS PS Go ahead click on the link... I love that song!

Out of sight, out of heart..

Hello!

A gloomy kind of day here where I live, makes you want to lay down and rot away… I hate moods like today, everything is somber and I see no way out. That is until you wonder around the pantry and find a stash of goodies that you didn't know were there. Last time something like this happened I took a fit against my wife and kids because they were deliberately hiding stuff from me; now I  am to blame because I buy stuff and forget that I had bought it for me. Age I guess, but it’s cool; I get to have something scrumptious when I least expected……

I was seeing pic from summer camp and hoped that this year passes fast so that I can go there again. I miss this year’s group. They were all a nice kids that I will probably never see again; I miss them much. I wish them all well and good luck in whatever they end up doing. I feel bad because I wanted to stay in touch with them but they took down the wrong email, it is  cbgmtl@videotron.ca not cbgltl@videotron.can oh well, the Universe and its reasons….

That’s my life, blaming the Universe whenever I can….

Take care folks…

Alive and kicking..

Hello!

Good day to you all…

It was (and still is) a busy week for me. Monday was Thanksgiving Canada, yesterday went to check out adaptive cars with my CMR lady and my wife, today they fixed my chair and discuss among them on how to solve the tilting device mechanism issue –the thing is a dud going kaput all the time-. Thanks to this conversation lead them to get an engineer to look at the issue on Friday, making me busy this Friday. So I am book solid until Friday… and I wanted an easy week…

Other than that nothing out of the ordinary happening with my life. I still think of summer camp and wish to be there again. In a couple of weeks I will be attending the chamber musical event with my girls and that 6 million dollar Stradivarius, here is hoping that the girls don’t break it. As I mentioned before, the event is being held at my old Alma matter University of Montreal and I can’t wait to step out on the town again…. Any hoot, best be going. Goto practice my listening skills and play some classical musik….

Later people…

Had to be South Dakota...

Hello!

Hope you are all fine….

I was not going to blog this weekend; take it slow for a change. But yesterday I had a weird dream that I was going to file under “antibiotic induce “ propaganda, but then read the meaning of it and basically said “WTF!”. The dream meaning was right on the nose: Lepers and Leprosy means that the inner you (soul) and your body are at war with each other on doing the right thing. Fak me! People, there is an inner battle going on with myself right now that I have to tackle or more than one person is going to get hurt....On a lighter note, apparently I'm going to summer camp again; according to my dream...so, yay!

Stupid lepers from South Dakota….

PS Maybe is just The Walking Dead talking to me...

PS PS I could also be sick.... better see the doctor.

I miss you Montreal....

Hello!

Miss me?

Well it was weird! I haven’t been in that neighborhood in eons. Plus, the guy who organized my presence had it all wrong. We were not going to eat in a quick and easy grub joint!? We were going to feast at a fancy bistro that basically served steak and fries; and it was GOO_OD! Walnut salad followed by a medium rare entrecote with Dijon sauce…. 

This was a joint that my old work buddies and bosses attended all the time. This is not a fast food place, no. This place you sit down, drink wine and reminisce about life and where you and they are today. I booked an hour and a half for the bus where I should have booked two and a half hours. I had a good time seeing my old bosses (3 out of 4) founders of the company I used to work for. I also was taken aback by the presence of old colleagues who jackassly remind me about my fail attempt to perform stand-up comedy…They asked me to call them up if I was going to do it again, I told them that there was a video tape that my sick wife had recorded and that was somewhere in my video library.

I think I want that video tape to be play at my funeral….

Take care folks….

PS Don't worry sweetheart, I haven't forgotten you... If ever I hit it big I will take you there....

PS PS Kudos on setting me up this morning, I had so many winks from women while in Montreal... I think I blushed...

Working my day away.....

Hello!

Happy almost Saturday!!

So preparing for the weekend?.... We have a 3 day weekend here in the great white north. Thanksgiving!!! Not that I celebrate it really, but it is always fun to have the day off; what am I talking about, I always have it off. But I am jumping the gun on the weekend here. Starting tomorrow I will be hitting downtown Montreal. It’s been forever since I have been there. Going to have lunch with a couple of ex-colleagues. So we will meet round noonish at the old Montreal Trust shopping mall; at least that was the plan last week. They better tell since I must reserve my bus today.

My day today has been completed already. I already had my bath and I am currently awaiting my lunch. From then on I will probably work on some cockamamie theory that I will forward to Stephen Hawking just to be emailed back with a “get a life loser”….

Tata folks…

PS Belgium is back! I miss you sooo much....

I'm the man!!

Howdy folks!

Hope your day’s as bright as your pearly white!

So I am feeling the pressure here. My reputation is being tested by my blog as well as by my daughter's high estimate of me when talking about me to her friends… “He’s cool”….

First of all welcome to my wonderland Belgium, I feel I know you and have fallen in love with you before; but I could be wrong. In any case, Helaba or Bonjour depending on the region you are from.

As for my daughter, she told me yesterday that she had a new

friend and they were getting to know each other when she (my kid) told her new friend that her dad was disabled and that he was cool….?!... How do I compete against that expectation of me? I know I’m good looking and have impeccable elocution skills (I have been told that when I speak, I make people wonder on the color of my soul), but what exactly is cool to my daughter? At this point I think it’s a gimmick to get what she wants from me because this morning she asked me for money to buy lunch.

What’s a cool dad to do?

Take care folks…

Mongolian dreams.

Hello!

Happy thoughts out to you people…shit, if I cannot be happy, I will wish it to somebody else….

I had a bad night, fell asleep till 2AM, thinking shit and a half, trying to come up with answers to questions that will probably never be answered; or events that may never happen. So obviously, this morning I woke up moody; thinking back about last night and coming up to the conclusion that I live in a safe, secure country that is boring and stupid!...yes, boring and stupid are keywords here people.

Canada....

You all have heard about Netflix, that on demand movie and TV provider? Well apparently here in Canacrap they are thinking of taking it out of service because A) they don’t have enough Canadian content and B) Not enough French shows…. Really?! Are you fucking kidding me?! Give us good TV and we will tune in!  Oh and by the way, that company doesn’t pay taxes and in this country where everyone must pay the piper it is a sacrilege that must be rectified…. You don’t know how bad I want to move out of this place, go live somewhere in Mongolia or something…..

Any hoot, ignore my bad mood people; it’s just growing pains…

Take care folks…

PS don't get me wrong, I love Canada and all its crazy canucks but Mongolia is calling me more and more...