Hello all!
Well is one of those days again, the ones when I don't feel up nor do I feel down. It's just a blah day when I have a lot of questions and very few answers. I don't know what triggered this type of day, maybe it was the doomsday TV shows that I was seeing yesterday about how if the universe wanted we could all be destroyed in seconds and how there wasn't nothing we could do; or and a big OR, it was the conversation about my kids I had with my wife this morning. You know, the one where you're realizing that they're growing faster than you wanted to.
My youngest one is in fourth grade and by the time she gets to high school my oldest one will be finishing high school; and that's not mentioning my niece that at that stage in life, if all goes well as planned, she will be finishing university. Just not so long ago I was playing baseball in the park!!! My older brother, and it will be sooner rather than later, will be a grandfather.
So I say it's a combination of both that triggered this existentialismist (I wonder if it's even a word) question. In one hand my head is debating the existence of humans in this planet and on the other I'm examining how fast my life went and I got nothing to show for.
I know, I know, seems I'm wasting my time on questions I cannot change the outcome to. But what can I do I have a lot of time in my hands and a computer with speech recognition.
It seems my life is in the stalemate, not going forward and not going backward. Well backward is another story. I am still working on my family tree and every day there's something new. Last post I revealed that in my family there was general that started the death squad in my country; today I can reveal that there was also a Jesuit priest who was a dear friend of Msgr. Romero. His name was Rutilio Grande and if you type his name in Google you will find many websites. Funny enough, well not funny, he was killed in an armed ambush probably set up by my other relative. My family is one fucked up melting pot. In one side the rich and powerful and on the other the poor and struggling; and I'm stuck in the middle.
Seriously, seriously!?! How in heavens name did my father married my mother, I have no idea. Two complete opposite sides got together and decided to start a family; and let's not even go to some other members that got into the family because my ancestors decided to have love affairs.
Well I guess if you guys dig long enough you too will find skeletons in your closet!
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